Fantasy Halfway -- Stars, Sucks, and Sleepers

Obviously the fantasy season is past the halfway point, but you gotta work with me here. There aren't any games that count for the next few days, so it's the perfect time to formulate these teams. Unlike the actual All-Star game, there are different parameters for judging who makes the fantasy All-Star team. Value matters. For example, Hanley Ramirez is obviously the best fantasy player in baseball. He was a high first round pick in every draft, though, so he's not really exceeding expectations.

There's a reason you make the fantasy All-Star team this way ... owners don't win leagues by drafting Hanley Ramirez first overall. You do, however, win your league by loading up on value picks like Josh Hamilton and Geovany Soto ... while you lose your league by taking some of the big names I'm going to list on the "bad" team.

I've named each team after their backstop. Why? I felt like it.

Let's have fun.

TEAM GEO (these are the fantasy All-Stars)

C - Geovany Soto -- You can convince me that you thought Geo was a top ten catcher and that he'd hit 20 home runs coming into the season. You can't convince me that you had him top three and on pace for almost 30.
1B - Lance Berkman -- Yeah, he was a high draft pick. He was also taken behind Albert Pujols, Miguel Cabrera, Prince Fielder, and probably Mark Teixeira and Ryan Howard in your league.
2B- Ian Kinsler -- He's more valuable in fantasy than Chase Utley. How much later did he go in your draft?
3B - Evan Longoria -- The top of this position is loaded -- ARod, Wright, Braun, Chipper, Aramis -- but you had to pay for those guys on draft day. In year-to-year leagues, Longoria was much less expensive on draft day and even cheaper two weeks later when he was in the minors.
SS - Michael Young -- After the Holy Trinity of fantasy shortstops -- Hanley, Jimmy, and Jose -- Young has been the top dog here.
OF - Josh Hamilton -- Easiest pick on here.
OF - J.D. Drew -- He really took off when David Ortiz went down, and most fantasy players were sluggish at best on his prospects for this season.
OF - Pat Burrell -- Just picked up where he left off after his scorching second half of '07. Of course, not many would have pegged him for 40-100 ... he's on pace for it.
DH - Milton Bradley -- Too many Rangers? Try too few highly ranked Rangers in the pre-season. They lead the majors in runs scored and also lead in disrespected players in fantasy drafts. I guess. Whatever. Milton's good.
SP - Roy Halladay -- Doc has more complete games than any other team, while the ERA and WHIP are sparkling ... and he should have a better record than 11-6. Damn that poor run support early in the season.
SP - Cliff Lee -- A dude in my league calls him "Cy Lee." Could you have imagined that before the season?
SP - Tim Lincecum -- We knew he was a stud, but no one thought he could win games for the terrible Giants. Well, they are terrible, and Tiny Tim has 11 wins.
CL - Kerry Wood -- Tell me you thought he'd stay healthy and keep the closing duties ... you're lying.

TEAM VICTOR (these are the "All-Suck" players)

C - Victor Martinez -- Zero home runs and an injury to boot.
1B - Prince Fielder -- He's on his way back, but there have been at least ten more valuable first baggers in fantasy, and you certainly didn't expect that coming in.
2B - Rickie Weeks -- How many years in a row is he going to be a breakout candidate?
3B - Miguel Cabrera -- He's picked it up in recent weeks as well and should be fine from here on out, but that slow start killed owners that drafted Miggy in the first round.
SS - Derek Jeter -- His name recognition and real baseball value make him very overrated in fantasy circles. He's not even on pace for ten bombs or steals.
OF - Alex Rios -- Just as you should never trust a dude with pink hair, you should never trust a dude named Alexis.
OF - Delmon Young -- Just like with Weeks, will we continue to be fooled?
OF - Jeff Francoeur -- That less-than-a-week demotion was less of a debacle than his pre-season draft position.
DH - Travis Hafner -- He sucks now. Plain and simple.
SP - Justin Verlander -- He's on the way back now, but there's a lot of work to be done to repair the damage he's done to teams after being a high draftee.
SP - Aaron Harang -- This drastic decline in performance makes no sense for a 30 year-old hurler. Hopefully it was all injury-related, but that strained forearm sort of sounds like a desperate attempt to find something.
SP - Brett Myers -- Erik Bedard and Roy Oswalt were in contention here, but no one flamed out like Myers. He was so pathetic someone on the street mistook him for Dontrelle Willis ... but then he reminded them Willis was shipped all the way to freaking Class A.
RP - Manny Corpas -- Disaster city. Probably the biggest bust on here, and that's saying something with Pronk, Victor, Harang, and Myers in the house.

TEAM DIONER (the likely undrafted deep sleepers that have unexpectedly helped fantasy teams)

C - Dioner Navarro -- Gotta love when you can get a .310 average from an undrafted catcher.
1B - Jorge Cantu -- He has 18 jacks and 54 ribbies. In the majors. In 2008. At the All-Star break.
2B - Mark DeRosa -- Career highs are 13 bombs and 74 RBI. He's almost on pace for 20 and 90.
3B - Mark Reynolds -- Yeah, you have to get lucky on when you have him active because of his extreme streakiness, but he has gone yard 19 times.
SS - Jerry Hairston, Jr. -- Even old friend Dusty Baker wanted Corey Patterson instead. All Hairston's done is hit .351 while playing most positions and stealing 15 bases in less than 200 at-bats.
OF - Carlos Quentin -- Only an injury to Jerry Owens allowed Quentin to start on his own team, and now he's an All-Star on pace for 120 RBI.
OF - Nate McLouth -- Looked like he was regressing and he went out and caught fire again. He entered the season with 25 career HRs and already has 19 this year.
OF - Ryan Ludwick -- Seriously picked up some of the offensive slack for a team that was expected to have an awful offense outside Phat Albert.
DH - Eric Hinske -- Stepped right in when Carlos Pena went down and now the Rays have real reason to keep him in the order. Who would have thought that coming in? He hit .204 last year.
SP - Edinson Volquez -- Just as easy as picking Hamilton. Did you hear they were traded for each other? No one in the MSM ever reports it.
SP - Justin Duchscherer -- He already has a career high in innings pitched, and his ERA is unreal (1.82). I think it's safe to say the conversion to starter is working out alright.
SP - Ryan Dempster -- Admit it, you thought he would suck. You called him things like "Dump Truck." Yeah, you know you did.
RP - Jon Rauch -- When he gets his chances to save games he's solid. You wouldn't have even given him a second look in the pre-season unless you have a setup-men-for-awful-teams fetish.