Fantasy Ducks

We're near the quarter point of this fine NHL season, so let's have a peek at some statistical odds and ends, trends, and other useless information you can impress your co-workers with.

While no coach would have much of a reason to put Jamal Mayers on the power-play, it's quite amazing that Mayers has played 532 NHL games and never had a single goal with the man advantage (63 career goals in that time). Not one! Even Donald Brashear, a man with far less offensive skill, has four power-play goals in his 'distinguished' career.

Are the refs asleep on Long Island? The New York Islanders have both the least amount of power-play opportunities for (67) and against (69). Meanwhile, the Ducks have the second most power-plays with 107 and most against with 111. So much for that laid-back West Coast mentality.

When the Detroit Red Wings won a Stanley Cup with Chris Osgood as their #1 goaltender many moons ago, many opined (including myself) that Osgood was, perhaps, the worst #1 goalie of a Cup winner, ever. This season, the Wings are rolling, despite having not getting good goaltending. With Osgood filling in for Dominik Hasek, who is injured again, the Wings have the 5th worst save percentage with 89.3%, but still have a 14-5-1 record. Go figure.

Not too long ago, there was talk that the Ducks might let go of high-priced J-S Giguere, and go with the much cheaper Ilya Bryzgalov as their #1 goalie.

Well, with Bryzgalov's pending UFA status, GM Brian Burke decided to waive the kooky Russian netminder.

If Bryzgalov isn't claimed, he'll be assigned to the team's American Hockey League club in Portland, Me.

Bryzgalov, who is making $1,362,500 this season, will be an unrestricted free agent at the end of the season.

For sure, this is a cost-saving measure, and one would have to speculate that the Ducks may be preparing for the return of one indecisive Scott Niedermayer. Why else would the Ducks just waive their long-time backup, who is generally above-average in his play? While Giguere has often been injured in the playoffs, Bryzgalov has always been there, picking up the proverbial ball and running with it.

Looking at this season's stats, Bryzgalov is the superior keeper in save percentage, and has provided with the Ducks with a guy they can depend on when Giguere isn't there.

Chris Kunitz, the former Hobey Baker finalist, joined the list of Anaheim Ducks scoring a big payday, as he signed a 4-year/$14.9mil extension this morning. Coming off of a Stanley Cup winning performance and break-out season, a raise was well-deserved for the 27-year old.

Kunitz will earn $1.15 million in the last year of his old deal this season before the new contract kicks in, paying him $3.5 million in 2008-09, $3.6 million in 2009-10, $3.8 million in 2010-11 and $4 million in 2011-12.

"Chris has been a very important multi-dimensional player for us the last two seasons, providing skill, physical play and leadership," Ducks GM Brian Burke said in a statement. "We are very pleased to have him signed prior to his eligibility as an unrestricted free agent next summer."

What's easy to forget, especially given the kind words Burke has for his player, is that it wasn't too long ago that Kunitz wasn't even wanted by his own team!

Despite all of Brian Burke's huffing and puffing, he did not, in fact, match Kevin Lowe's offer sheet to chunky winger Dustin Penner. Hence, the 29-goal scorer is going to Edmonton with a fat-like-Louie Anderson $21.5mil contract over five seasons.

Desperate for an injection of offense that only a free agency syringe could provide, Lowe paid heavily for a young forward who has just 101 games of experience and one productive season under his hockey pants. Not only are the Oilers coughing up $4.3mil per season for an rather unproven commodity, they also have to give up three draft picks (a 1st, 2nd, and 3rd rounder).

I understand that Kevin Lowe wants some offense, but for that much money, and those kind of draft picks, you better be getting a star. The chances are, Penner will be a solid winger, but nowhere near the kind of assets that Lowe just pissed away. The Oilers would have been better off saving these assets for another day, rather than over-spending in a desperate attempt to get SOMETHING!

"But Jes, they need the offense just to make the playoffs!"

Right, and when they try and make improvements in the future just to make the playoffs (because they are a long way away, folks), or make other moves to strengthen their team, they'll realize that they are hamstrung because they paid so much for a 2nd-line winger.

Many Oilers fans, obviously, aren't too thrilled with having their GM pay SO MUCH for so little. Yet, despite of Lowe's fantasy GM-type moves, you'll be hard-pressed to get any game tickets in Edmonton this fall.

The list of smurf-sized players that rocked the minors and sucked in the NHL is longer than John Holmes: Steve Kariya, Brandon Reid, Stanislav Chistov, Jason Krog, Keith Aucoin, and Darren Haydar, to name a few.

Many such players often have to find a new team before they are given a chance to succeed, such as Ray Whitney and Martin St. Louis.

So, where does newly acquired Canuck Ryan Shannon fit in?

They [Ducks] were looking for a change for Ryan and we think he has a chance to be an NHL regular, but it's not a lock," Vancouver Senior Vice-President and General Manager Dave Nonis said.

"We think he has some upside and he definitely has a second gear - he's one of the fastest in the league but his size may be a factor."

After rocking the AHL to the tune of 95 points in 85 games over the past two seasons, Shannon, generously listed as 5'9" 178lbs, earned a full-time job with the Ducks, but produced just 11 points in 53 NHL games. You can be forgiven if you don't recognize his name, even if it is now engraved on the Stanley Cup. Shannon was a bit part for the Ducks, and never made his presence felt.

At 24, Shannon is no spring chicken, so he won't get a lot of chances to prove himself as an NHL-caliber offensive forward. That is why the Ducks let him go, and why the Canucks acquired him.

The Anaheim Ducks took another big step in keeping their loaded team together after locking down goalie J-S Giguere to a four year deal late Thursday night.

Giguere's pending free agent status, together with Scott Niedermayer making rumblings about retiring, made it seem like the Ducks domination would be short-lived. Ever the master he is, Burke made sure Giguere didn't go anywhere else.

The terms? Six million buckaroos a season for four seasons, plus all bra padding he requests.

"He's an important part of our hockey team, not just the way he's played in the regular season but in the way he's excelled in the playoffs," said [Ducks GM Brian] Burke. "His work ethic is the best I've ever had at his position. He's a vital part of our ability to compete and repeat."

"This is a player who, had he gone to July 1, could have obtained a greater deal," Burke said from Columbus, Ohio, where he and his staff were preparing for the first round of the entry draft Friday night. "When a player makes that commitment, which is so rare in professional sport, it should never go unnoted.

"GMs should say `thank you' when a player does that. It is rare in this landscape, this modern era of pro sport."

Calm down, Brian! Considering Giguere is making more on one year than many people make in 30, I don't think Jiggy is being all THAT generous.

Still, you had to know other teams would have open the vaults to sign Giguere. With J-S signed, only Dominik Hasek remains as a free agent goaltender that doesn't suck. This free agent market really is a famine for the remaining GMs looking for a juicy goaltending morsel.

One would think that Anaheim Ducks defenseman Scott Niedermayer, who just won the Stanley Cup and Conn Smythe trophies, would be kicking ass and taking names for years to come.

Apparently not, claims Ducks GM Brian Burke, who relayed a shocking bit of info to the hockey world.

"Scott has indicated that he's thinking about retirement," Ducks GM Brian Burke told The Canadian Press on Tuesday.

The Conn Smythe Trophy winner as playoff MVP informed Burke of the possibility during the players' exit interviews a few days after Anaheim won its championship.

Now that Scott, who is 33 years of age, has fulfilled a life-long dream of winning the cup with his brother, Rob Niedermayer, there isn't much for Scott to play for other than large paychecks and groping groupies.

Some players don't need or have the desire to play until their legs fall off and they are booted out unceremoniously. Wayne Gretzky quit at the right time, while Mark Messier played long after his best-before date.

I just can't fathom how Scott Niedermayer could possibly retire when he's on top of the hockey world. This isn't a Barry Sanders situation, where Scott is stuck with a bad franchise. The Ducks are favorites to win the Cup next year, and Scott couldn't ask for a better situation to be in.

After a few fishing trips, I'm sure the hockey craving will come back to Scotty, and he'll be leading the Ducks to another successful season.

The Sedins do everything together, including water aerobics, eating ice cream, buying condos, and cycling the puck in the offensive zone.

The Sedin twins are known for having some kind of psychic connection on the ice, and they have rarely ever been apart, save for penalty-killing situations.

Well, desperate times call for drastic measures, and it seems the twins will probably be split apart for Game Five:

"Obviously, they have played so well together all year long, they have been our best offensive players, but right now in the playoffs, except for maybe Game 1 and Game 7 of the Dallas series, they haven't been as good as they have been all year long," [coach] Vigneault told the Vancouver Sun. "They seem to be skating in quicksand on different nights. I know they want to do well and they want to be the go-to guys, but right now their game is not as good as it was during the season."

Not quite as good? That's quite understating it, don't ya think?

Henrik Sedin: An amazing 71 assists and 81 points in 82 regular season games compared to 2 assists and 4 points in 11 playoff games. Henrik's slap-pass on the Power Play is far too predictable and he's not having much luck connecting on his feeds. His team-worst -6, playing mostly head-to-head against opposing checking lines, is downright awful.

Daniel Sedin: Led the Canucks with 84 points in 81 games, but has just 5 in 11 playoff games. He actually leads the NHL in playoff shots (48), but has been snake-bit and also generating fairly low-quality chances. He needs to get to the front of the net more often.

The real issue is that the Sedin's can't or won't kick their game into another gear. While a guy like Trevor Linden is noticeably working harder and hitting anything that moves, the Sedins are cruising around at the same speed and intensity that they were in the regular season.

That just won't do ... so, maybe this wake-up call will do something. It has to, or the Canucks are finished.