Fantasy New England Patriots

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I've had this discussion with several people in the last few weeks. And the answer, I think, is yes – for these reasons.

1) Peyton Manning is not Barry Bonds.

For the last five years, Manning and Bonds have both been the best players in their respective sports. And we don't love either of them the way we love other superstars. But that's where the similarities end.

Bonds is a jerk and a cheater; Manning is unlikable for entirely different reasons. They're the same reasons people don't like Duke basketball or Alex Rodriguez. Keith Olbermann's recent description of Rodriguez applies: "I think he thinks his success is predicated on self-control, on physical self-control. But it means he acts - in what he says, in the gestures he makes when he hits a home run or a double, like a ballet dancer trying to memorize his steps. He aims to please. He never just lets it wail."

We don't like Bonds because he's indifferent. We don't like Manning because he cares too much.

2) The Indianapolis Colts are not the New York Yankees.

They are probably the closest thing the Patriots have to a rival, but they are not bad, so to speak. They do not outspend their nearest competitors by 65% by exploiting a communist statute that prevents other teams from moving into their oversized media market. They are not owned by a convicted felon who broke the law to help reelect the most corrupt president of the 20th century. They aren't perennially overrated, leading naïve nine-year-olds to waste their allowances the rookie cards of overhyped Yankee prospects. They're not smug. They're not the subject of weird media fetishes. And their fans didn't all root for the Mets in the '80s.

3) Fantasy football isn't real football.

Having Peyton Manning on your fantasy team is like having an opposite-sex friendship. It's potentially complicated, but something everyone above the age of twelve should be able to do.

It's time for the most vital Patriots analysis you'll read all year: the fantasy breakdown! Which Pats will be racking up points for your team? And which are better left to rot unloved on the waiver wire?

The Pats are notoriously confounding when it comes to all matters fantasy. The ball gets spread around, and it's darn near impossible to guess who'll emerge as a red zone rock star. Consider: Linebacker Mike Vrabel (of no use to the fantasy drafter) caught three touchdown passes from Tom Brady last year. Meanwhile, starting wide receiver David Givens caught two.

Even 2005 mainstay Corey Dillon (12 rushing touchdowns) looks to be a gamble, as he'll split time with promising rookie Laurence Maroney. And Deion Branch, with his team-high five TD catches in 2005? He might not take the field at all. It seems your best bets are Brady, tight end Ben Watson, placekicker Stephen Gostkowski, and the defense. But if you're looking for a dark horse candidate, take a peek at running back Heath Evans. In the Pats' final exhibition game, as they neared the goal line on their first possession, Evans got his number called three straight times before finally reaching paydirt. And he tied for the team lead in touchdowns in the preseason, with three rushing and one receiving. (Of course, he tied with running back Patrick Cobbs ... who has since been cut. So back to the drawing board there. Like I say, confounding.)

Right now, I'd go with Maroney, even though Addai seems to be going higher in most fantasy drafts. He's certainly got a ton of upside, does Addai, playing in a high-powered offense that was very kind to Edgerrin James over the years. But Maroney might be in an even better situation in New England, and he might be a better player.

The reviews for Laurence Maroney coming out of New England are positively glowing. Gene Shalit's review of Titanic wasn't this positive. And consider that Corey Dillon's getting old, he's prone to getting banged up, Bill Belichick prefers young and cheap to old and expensive... It's more of a hunch than anything else, but I really think the Maroney/Dillon tandem could be turning into a sort of Willie Parker/Jerome Bettis situation in New England this year.

As I said, though, Addai certainly has a ton of upside, especially if he takes the #1 job completely away from Dominic Rhodes. But that's the thing, I can't envision that happening, at least not to the degree fantasy owners would like to see it happen. Rhodes has been there a while, he's performed very well when given the chance, and the Colts know exactly what they're getting from him. Even Edgerrin James lost some goal line carries in Indy, so it's hard for me to imagine Dominic Rhodes being pushed completely out of the way.

Not that the preseason numbers mean a ton, but if you're interested, Maroney's carried the ball 15 times for 94 yards, and a 6.3 yards-per-carry average, while Addai's carried 12 times for just 20 yards, and a 1.7 yards-per-carry average. Consider moving Maroney up your draft boards.